The Crone At The Temple
Echoing the archetype of the Triple Goddess-Mother, Maiden & Crone
Image Credit: Three Witches from Macbeth by Gustave Dore 1832-1883
I am a runner, this is what I do. Well this is what I have told myself for the last twenty plus years. I have ran thousands of miles- trails, road, mountains, you name it, I have done it. I ran two big races last year, a 25K in May and a fall marathon. My training cycle was essentially 10 months long. The last race was on the Libra Lunar Eclipse in October, ruled by Venus. The race went good enough, beat by personal best by 17 seconds, though I had higher goals. When I finished the race, my usual upbeat roaring competitor was just nowhere to be found. I saw my husband at the finish line and believe I said, “Don’t let me do this again.” I know I didn’t fully mean it, but I did sense within me, something was shifting in my relationship to running and to my identity as a runner.
Pluto entered my sixth house Aquarius at the end of January, a house of health, matters of chronic health issues can show up here, as well as overall health ailments in general (first house is also associated with body/health). Intuitively, I began internally conversing with my borderline future crone, the one whom I know is on the rise as much as I don’t care to acknowledge. Pluto represents death and the underworld, as well as plowing nutrient-deficient fields that are suffering from degraded soil health. The Crone, an archetype of the aging woman who has slipped out of her maiden years and now is approaching the last leg of her journey, is a sacred image as a woman. She reminds us of the impending end, but can also possess a repository of extensive wisdom, intuition and insight. She asks us for sacrifices, but gives us heightened sense of life and if we are really listening, messages from beyond. She is the qualitative aspect of quantitative time. She is there lurking in the distance, eyeing my every move, observing the nutrients and not-so-nutritious moves, casting longer shadows around personal patterns I carry. I feel her circling my temple, she wants a sacrifice. I told myself in the early new year prior to the injury, it is time to start preparing the grounds for this future tenant. I am nearly 46 years old, and I often have to remind myself of that number. Despite constantly studying linear time in relation to astrological qualitative time, I forget, or choose not to remember, that my own qualitative time is shifting.
Saturn represents bones, aging, constraints, decay and the falling away of time, and ultimately death.
Image Credit: Author’s Knee X-Ray
At the end of January, I suffered an odd knee injury, it showed up out of nowhere. I wasn’t even running. My knee swelled and a baker cyst suddenly formed. Long story short, after initial care and recovery, and x-rays, we found the beginnings of arthritis setting in and possible loose body floating in the knee cap. The Crone is walking up to my door.
I stopped running immediately, even though the swelling went down and I had zero pain. Running was completely uncomfortable, but walking was good. Walking was really good. I have been hiking a lot, and bringing my 100-pound pup for the slow stride. I have been working on leash training, improving her listening skills, and she is making strides, and the walks have been quite enjoyable. I have enjoyed the slowing down overall, the decrease of obsessive running thoughts. I walk when I feel like it, there is no obligation. I am signed up for adult swim classes to master strokes and breathing at the end of this month. This injury has made space for many new mental and spiritual activities and insights as well. Saturn in Pisces, learning new skillsets for long-term gain, sacrificing one activity to make space for new skills and mindsets.
This is nearly the longest I have gone without running or any intense aerobic activity, nearly three months. I even ran up to 8 months pregnant, and took just a month off after delivery. The weird thing is, I have been fine. I miss aspects of it, but I honestly don’t miss it. The Crone has entered my temple.
Today, April 10th, Mars and Saturn go conjunct in Pisces, which opposes not only my first house of self and body, but also it is my Mars opposition. This transit also comes two days after the total Solar Eclipse in Aries. I went to the orthopedic doctor this morning, and he ran more x-rays and found good news that there is still a lot of space left between the joints and that it is the outside of my knee that is building tiny bone spurs which is causing the irritation. The left knee looks healthy too! Short of doing an MRI, he does believe it could be a bone spur that came loose that set this injury off. Yet he was confident with a cortisone gel shot, I should be feeling much better and if I want to run, I should be able to again with no issue. He gave me a few more physical therapy directives, completely doable, to help preserve the health of my knee.
Mars on the simplest, interpretative level is represented by sharp objects, pull the image of of knives, swords, needles, forward. Mars is also associated with inflammation. Saturn represents limits, constraints, aging, decay, death and dying, and literal bones. I received a sharp Mars like injection into what is constraining me, bones. It was gel that was injected to provide a greater amount of fluid. Pisces is mutable water, and in my knees, the viscosity of the water is mutably changing due to wear and tear and age. Sometimes astrology is just that exact. I go into deeper introspection on this transit here.
Greek Mythology speaks of the Fates, 3 Goddesses of Destiny- Cloto, Lachesis, and Atropos. Representing birth, life and death.
Image Credit: 15th Century Flemish Tapestry
I am going forward, holding the Crone in my heart, acknowledging she is closer than I care to admit. This is the hard cold reality that Saturn brings. In my chart, both Saturn and Venus share space and are afflicted. This combination has presented in many challenging ways through out my life, but always holding the highest wisdom when I choose to have eyes to see. I am reorienting my path towards health and my own personal persona, letting “I am a runner” be redefined. Maybe I will be again, but it is not what defines me. This is one of the greatest lessons I have absorbed in the last few months.
I know intuitively, Pluto’s long transit through my sixth house is asking me to revise my own approach to my health, this is just the first instance. These are the early degrees of Pluto in Aquarius, a threshold of sorts. I still feel some days like a maiden and certainly am a mother. Lachesis, the mother fate, is still overseeing these middle years, dispensing my current fate. Pluto will be in Aquarius, my sixth house until 2043, which by then I will be an official Crone, Atropos will be handing out the lots. Atropos in Greek means inflexlibe, and it is where we get the word atrophy, to decay. Atropos, the elder fate, was said to preside over the final act of life, ultimately cutting the thread Cloto first spun. Pluto raises the awareness to be sensitive to the coming changes, and to prepare the grounds for the Crone’s absolute residence. It does not mean stop all activity, in sharp contrast, it reminds me to slow my patterns down and reroute my activity for ultimate longevity of healthy movement. Quantitative time still moves forward as much as I resist, yet astrological qualitative time warns me and encourages me that I too have a role to play. The Crone is at my altar.